Aunty Lei been in da kitchen, whippin' up some ono grinds fo' da luau later. She hummin' one happy mele, when all of a sudden, she spot someting outta da corner of her eye.

"Chee!" she yell, jumpin' back. "Wat dat?!"

On da countertop, crawlin' slow and steady, stay one cockroach. But not jus' any cockroach, brah. Dis one stay BUMBOOCHAH! Big like one small kine dog, wit' antennas long like chopsticks.

Aunty Lei's heart stay poundin' like one Tahitian drum. She neva see one cockroach dat big in her whole life. She grab da nearest ting she can find - one slippah - and raise it up high.

"Eh, you ugly buggah!" she shout, ready fo' strike.

Da cockroach stop, turn its head, and look at her wit' its beady lil' eyes. Aunty Lei hesitate small kine. Da ting stay so big, it's almost like it get one personality.

Den, wit' one final "HIYAH!", she swing da slippah down. Da cockroach dodge it wit' ninja-like reflexes, scurry across da counter, and disappear behind da rice cooker.

Aunty Lei stay huffin' and puffin', her heart still racin'. She know she gotta find dat bumboocha buggah befo' it invite all its friends fo' one luau in her kitchen.

She move da rice cooker, peek behind da toaster, even check inside da cabinets. No sign of da cockroach.

"Aisus," she mumble, "Whea dat ting go?"

Jus' den, she hear one rustle from da fruit bowl. She slowly lift up one banana, and dere it stay, da bumboocha cockroach, munchin' on one apple.

Dis time, Aunty Lei no hesitate. She trap da cockroach unda one glass bowl, den slide one piece of cardboard undaneat'. Wit' one swift move, she take da whole ting outside and set it free in da bushes.

"Go find yo' own luau, you bumboocha buggah!" she tell da cockroach, den go back inside fo' finish cookin'.

From dat day on, Aunty Lei always keep one eye out fo' bumboocha cockroaches. And every time she see one regular-size one, she feel one small kine relief. "At least you no stay one bumboocha," she whisper, den squash 'em wit' her slippah.